This week has been particularly loaded with major announcements in the consumer electronics field. Today Microsoft unveiled their “iPod killer,” the “Zune” which apparently means “fart” or “rape” in some other language.
On your left, you will see a promotional picture of the Zune in action. On your left you will also see a picture embedded within that Zune of two sexy fucksomethings frolicking in the water.

Using structures present in the photograph, it is not too difficult to ascertain that these people are wading up to their knees in the East River.

Frankly, I’m all for a fair, non-monopolistic marketplace, even if unseating the iPod from the ubiquity throne is a near impossible task. But I can’t get behind a product that champions immersing one’s legs in a toxic soup consisting of benzene, nuclear waste, whale shit, manufacturing byproducts, SARS, medical waste, fear, dirty diapers, old bagels, urine, mafia informants, unwanted orphans, liquid hatred, pizza sauce, more urine and plain old dirty water.

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